Love hard or avoid it like the plague ~ Keeping it Real with Jolene & Harlow


Hi guys!! I hope all of you are staying warm. Currently there is some wicked blizzard thing happening here in Nebraska. So, I’m staying home. It’s better to be safe than stuck in a ditch somewhere. 

Hey Harlow how are you doing this morning? Are you done molesting that coffee pot and well caffeinated? if so, let’s continue but if not we can wait around a few minutes so you can quickly down another cup. It’s not like we don’t have more entertaining blogs to read or jobs to get back to or diapers to change (not my own).

I’m done with coffee… is it too early for wine? No diapers today.  I already did my day trading, worked out, and did some light yoga.  I’m fucking owning this day and it’s not even 9 am yet!

img_6985So let’s tackle this subject the best way we know how…..let’s grab it by the balls and have our way with it.


Do you love hard or have you given up on it? Honestly, a year ago I wouldn’t have even uttered the word love without my gag reflex reacting or shooting you a sideways look of disgust. This is not to say that I’m ready to jump back out there and give love a shot because I think I’m doing pretty good with this year and a half sabbatical of no penis/love.

Harlow can you please keep your gasps down I think everyone on the East coast heard you.

Umm, Jolene your kitty needs attention. Ya think?

Well, love. What is love?  That is the first question that needs to be answered. There’s the love you feel for your pet, the love you feel for your kids, and the love you feel for your spouse and family.  That’s a different beast than “love” I’d say.  That’s devotional love.  The kind you would die for. “Some” will die for, some people will just love when it’s convenient for them. 

Now let’s talk true love. Young souls do not understand this term.  They feel stronger for someone and most likely think they are “in love” when most likely, it’s lust and infatuation.

Young adults and well, some adults don’t have a clue. Every man or woman they meet is their “soulmate” ….dude, you just met an hour ago. Slow down!!!  but I agree with you many of these new “love” emotions are lust or infatuation based. 

This is a very dangerous form of love. This is what I like to call the manipulation stage.  Older more cunning souls know this and are able to weld their prey any way they want.  This is where you get your narcissists and womanizers. 

Throw in charming sociopaths. Good point… 

It takes a lot of experience to know the difference and, in my case, a lot of heartbreak.

It seriously takes a weak, heartless man to play with a woman’s heart. To build them up with false hope and empty promises knowing full well they have (had) no intention to follow through. I will never understand this. Never. Trust me, I’ve tried.

And don’t get me started on when you’re ghosted. That’s the fucking worse! believe me when I say that for the man who ghosted me, he will truly know what ghosting is when I fucking haunt his ass when I pass. Sure, that won’t be for quite sometime…..but trust me, it will happen and I fucking can’t wait!!   

Word of advice, don’t be a dick or a coward …. give the person some closure. That’s the least you can do, be fucking human. 

True love does not harm.  True love warms your soul. True love is rare. Not every one in their physical lifetime will find it. 

When it comes to love are you a love hard kind of person? Do you go all in and then smother them with love juice, okay that didn’t sound right……are you more the giver than the receiver in the relationship?

Love juice? Teeheehee.  To answer your question. Yes. I believe there is no other way, regardless if I know in the end I will get hurt. 

To love and be loved.  There’s no greater thing. So yes, it’s worth the pain and journey in hope of finding our one.

For myself, at first I go in with caution, kinda searching for those hidden red flags and once “nerdy ninja” does her undercover work scouring the internet for the true details of the man, then I allow myself  to be hit with the love bug and that’s when the rose-colored glasses are firmly over my eyes and I give myself permission to go all in. I treat that person like, well honestly…… like I would want to be treated. Plus, I love romance…not the cheesy type, but the authentic from your heart type of romance and if someone can be more creative than those stupid fruit salad emoji’s text messages and actually converse with me like an adult that is a real turn on. I enjoy being stimulated mentally….it’s a turn on. I know you have to agree, I mean we have had this conversation before.


Yeah, let’s just say I’ve searched a many of IP addresses for this girl LOL. Your soul is guarded. You’re heart chakra is tighter than a nun’s hoohah. I get it.  The past experience’s for you have been horrible.  I hate them for making you hate love. 

I’ve been working hard on clearing the heart chakra. Thanks to reiki and kundalini yoga. That’s been a flipping blessing in and of itself but yeah for a while nothing was ever going to be allowed to penetrate these walls. I noticed (and I think you did as well) that the more I guarded myself the more sad I became and the more I replayed past situations in my head. I couldn’t or wouldn’t allow that anymore. It wasn’t serving ME. 

When life knocks you down, stand the fuck up and say “You hit like a bitch.”

Loving after heartbreak can be tough as well. I know some of my readers are going through that.  Do you have a story you can share when love just fucked you over and you prevailed after being stabbed in the back by the one you thought was your Prince Charming?

Whew. Ok, there was a guy in high school that broke my heart.  The end.

I know I know.  Turn down the scowl.  Hehe.

My ex broke me for a long time. I blame my age and inexperience when dealings with matters of the heart.  We started “going out” and things were great for about a month.  Then. December 19th, six days before Christmas my father died suddenly from a heart attack. He couldn’t handle me in my grieving state so six days before Valentines’ he dumped me.

Hold on a fucking second. He couldn’t handle your grieving state? what a fucking dick!! What is up with men who can’t be man enough to put their ego aside and take care of the person that they claim to adore and love? This reminds me of when I was wheel chair bound due to a ski accident and the guy that I was dating (who took me on the trip) broke up with me a month later stating, “I don’t have the energy to put forth in this relationship.” Good riddance to him and his pinky size penis.  LOL I snorted…I wasn’t kidding about the pinky size penis. That shit scarred me for LIFE. 

I never quite got over that feeling of being utterly and hopelessly alone.  Fast forward a year and I took the prick back…again I was stupid.  It was only after a couple of years later did I realize he was abuser of a different nature I care to not talk about.

Nothing that a black candle and a request to the bad ass Hecate can’t handle!

And duct tape…just saying.

Trying to find the courage to even give love a chance after being sucker punched in the gut after the love of your life turns out to be a dud is the fucking worse. I’ve turned to my dark side more than I would like to admit and consulted my share of witches, voodoo priestesses and mediums to help rectify my broken heart and maybe help with assisting in some fun….maybe some anal leakage for Mr. DudleyDoLittle was on my request.

(and if you are an ex who happened to stumble (stalk) upon this and you haven’t had any bouts of anal leakage, penis shrinkage than you’re good. For now.)

Jolene, I think it’s time. You have done a LOT of soul work this past year and you’re connected with your spirit and learned to love yourself.  Question is are you ready to love someone else?

The bravest thing you will ever do is love again.  – Madalyn Beck

Dude, I wasn’t ready for that question but honestly, damn …. I’m not sure why the thought brought up so many emotions. My stone cold heart actually woke the fuck up. Seriously though, I am ready to love again. It will take a strong man who is up for a challenge of wit. He will have to have a kind and understanding soul, one who will prove that he is not like those of my past. He will protect me with his heart and honor me with his loving and safe touch. He will respect my truth as I will respect his.  I mean, that’s not really too much to ask.

I will do my best not to hold my past lovers actions against him because how fair is that?

Don’t get me wrong, I love, love but I’m not going to just date anyone just for the fun of it. When it’s time the universe will allow our paths to cross. I’m not going to search for Mr. Right or Mr. Right now just so I can fill some empty void because truthfully, I’m not lonely.  I’m extremely content with my life so whatever the universe has in store or up its sleeve, I’m game.  My only request to Spirit is that he doesn’t wear tighty whities, doesn’t have a fascination with tranny porn or have bad oral hygiene, doesn’t have a mental instability, is not currently involved with someone else or has an ex that purposely sabotages their exes relationships.  

But first thing is first, I have to tackle some yoga moves and get limber before the universe throws their choice in my path.

So Harlow, I hope you’re up for the challenge of seeing how two non-yogis try to master some not so beginner yoga poses in seven days. Please, don’t hurt yourself. Maybe…..have a glass or two of wine before you practice.

But I think I can master the corpse pose, the other ones though will take some work and maybe some props…..but if that older lady can do it then I can to!


This should prove interesting…

This song suits this post so well…

Dude how in the fuck did you do that? I’ve tried a couple of times to add a video with this new blog and I haven’t been able to find the right code or widget……leave it to nerdy ninja to show me up.  *I bow down to you woman*


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